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This release is built on the foundation of a live recording from some time ago, back on Long Island, New York. (During a time that was known as the Artie Recording Studio Sessions). I had been wanting to work on it and finish it, for quite some time now. (The drummer alone, is amazing). It was a challenge for sure. In fact, I am still not sure how I managed to transform the recording to a workable downloadable .wav file! But anyway, the foundation track mentioned, is just the three of us. (After some kind of rift with some of the performing members of The New Era band at the time, that I am going to just touch upon here, as part of the influence to the lyrics). Steve M. on bass. Joe O. on drums, and me on guitar and vocals. The lyrics are basically based on several things that had occurred, or were occurring around this time. One, was regarding a girl I was dating while working at a very large company as a contract employee, right before the drastic downturn and shakeup in the Defense manufacturing Industry on Long Island, which was like the mainstay of the local economy for something like 40 years! Also, the other part of the influence to the lyrics was a strange rift and argument that had taken place, as if someone was deliberately (and in a strange manner) trying to break up the band, for some reason. The issue with the girl I mentioned (and I kinda' hate to say this) was like my first somewhat naive encounter with, what I became aware later, was known as: ‘White Trash’! If I can be frank. (I mean, I have to be honest when I say, that she herself was someone who was like, REALLY strange). You see, I wasn't aware at first, that she also had this like, psychopath (in part) boyfriend! So, allot of weird things started happening, mostly after I had left the company. i.e. Things like, all of a sudden, these strange, suspicious, creepy, criminal looking bikers starting to stalk me, and the like! It was a mind blower in itself. (But that's basically all I am going to say about it). You see, I also sort of reluctantly took the advice of a close friend at the time, to not just ditch her altogether. (When I really wanted to tell her to go f**k herself and kick her out of my car, after she had informed me in a rather disturbing way, that she had decided that she was going back with this old boyfriend, which was really her prerogative of course, but it was the way she did it that got me more then a little concerned about her, herself as a person). And she was a pretty attractive girl, in different ways. (And thought maybe, just maybe, there was something more to her). So, once again, rather reluctantly, I chose to test out my friend's advice. (And not totally kick her out of my car). Sorta, like a learning experience, I guess. But she was like, WAY too fu**ed up in the head, and crazy. And too far gone. (As much as I hate to say it, as there is really no other way to say it, I guess, and there are no names being mentioned here). You see, she told me that she was the way she was, because she was hurt by someone in some kind of previous relationship. I mean, I get it. But that's really no excuse for hating (and wanting to deliberately hurt) ALL men, and having such a low self-esteem, that you would want to settle for a big fat, ugly psychopath! I mean, we've ALL been hurt before. That's freakin' selfish (and self-centered) as f**k! A little cautious maybe, I could understand, but being totally wacked out in the head is another matter. As I said, this was like a new experience for me, at the time. I had never met a girl as crazy, messed up in the head (and deliberately stupid and complicated) as she was, before. But anyway, that was like, the beginning of some seriously strange sh*t, I have to say. Especially, when I started to put two and two together. (And I made sure to stay away from her, from that point on). But that is beyond the scope of this post. And never-the-less, as I said, this was like, just part of the influence to the lyrics. The other influence, was the strange confrontation that happened around the same time, with the band (that really didn't seem to make much sense, and was like, also pretty bizarre) as I mentioned. But I had to sorta like, let it go as well, and move on. So, the track is basically about letting go (when you absolutely have to) is my point. And learning about people, especially when you are cut from a different cloth and all. (As I believe, there was also more to the story, that I am not going to get into here). But, I think, some may still actually be able to relate. One way, or the other. For me, re-doing this song, has become something of a reminder, and sorta' reliving that experience. (While documenting with this track, and post, that time in my life). As well as, the beginning of a time, when the area where I was living, was really, never to be the same again. (And also, during a period, when Bob Matherson himself, who was the owner of the infamous Oak Beach Inn nightclub for example, had written his very revealing book). Although, there WERE also many good times (and memories I will just never forget) as well, over the years. I mean, I did grow up there to begin with. But thought these points were kinda' worth mentioning and documenting (as personal as they are) for myself at least, more then anyone, as the lyrics to the song do seem to sound a little angry. But, there are also many songs out there (and over the years) like that as well. That's just what artists do. But would now like to put these type of somewhat angry songs (especially from my younger days) behind me, if nothing else…
Disclaimer: I thought it was important to note, that when I use the word “ugly” here, I of course mean it in context. And don't intend to mean it in an offensive way, or in a malicious manner. (I am a compassionate person by nature, and would never mean it in a derogatory or insulting manner regarding someone who has some kind of infirmity for example). “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder”, as the saying goes. (Some people may consider me ugly, for example). It is purely hyperbole. Ugly on the inside (that is reflected on the outside) and creepy, is really mostly what I was attempting to convey here. (But I would think that most sensible people would understand this). Sometimes words just fall short. And as far as the girl I mentioned, I wish her the best…
But while I'm on this (and to finally put all this sh*t to rest) this is something that I recently noticed on my Spotify profile, that has really bothered me (which is obviously the motive behind it) and that I have wanted to get off my chest as well, and ironically, may even be sorta like in relation to the basic premise of the track itself, and what I mentioned above, and some of the seriously sick minds and diseased souls who unfortunately share this planet. I mean, just look at the image in this screen shot here: “The World Made Me Do It”!!! W.T.F.? Yea, you see, uhm, wow. I think its pretty obvious what this is saying, and another reason why I want to put this all to rest. I mean, it says, that I am featured on “The World Made Me Do It”!!! And the title of the album(?) is: “Oh No, IT's YO”!!! Damn. Whew. (I mean, imagine what a sick mind you would have to have, just to go to the lengths of creating something like this, so you could just put it on my profile?! Beyond me, man. You have to be seriously chompin' at the bit to begin with). I checked it out, and I don't even appear ANYWHERE on this playlist(?) to begin with. So, may have to contact Spotify about this, and see what's going on, and have it removed. But the implications are obvious. (To me, anyway). And how did it even get there in the first place? Strange. And, of course (among other things) it shows the prevalence behind the insanity and the comradery among most of the really serious Career Criminals, that they have with each other. (Particularly, the ones with the REALLY dark minds). But never-the-less, this is some of the sh*t that I've had to put up with. I'm not even going to go into the whole spiel again, of the area I lived in, etc. etc. I mean, that's kinda what they want. They want to get under your skin. It's obvious. (Some of them even LIVE FOR IT!!! It's incredible). But it says allot, man. No doubt about it. (I learned ALLOT over the years, oh yea). If nothing else, I've become incredibly wiser for sure. (And stronger, I guess). Enough said…
